A joke

To whom it may concern,

Since I upgraded "Boyfriend 5.0" to "Husband 1.0" last year, the system has lowered efficiency, especially "Send flower" or "Jewellery" functions which were active in "Boyfriend 5.0". Besides, "Husband 1.0" took off some useful software modules, such as "Romantic 9.5" and "Care 6.5" and put "FIFA World cup 5.0", "NBA 3.0"&"PS2 4.1" instead. "Sweet Talk 8.0" is inoperational. When I'd like to execute "Housework 2.6", the entire system crashes. I try to use "Nag 5.3", but the problem is still there.

What can I do?

An impatient user

====================

To: Re: Upgrade "Husband 1.0"

Dear impatient user,

At first, please be aware of "Boyfriend 5.0" is entertainment software and "Husband 1.0" is an operating system. You may try to download "Tears 6.2" from "http:I-thought-you-love-me.htm" browser, also "Guilty 3.0" renew file as well. If this software are functions, then "Husband 1.0" should be able to auto execute "Send flowers 3.5"&"Jewellery 2.0" functions.

Pls pay attention, if you overuse upload functions, it could auto link to execute "Lose temper 2.5","Stay in bar 7.0" and "Beer 6.1". "Beer 6.1" is a bad software, it will auto download a test software "SnoreLoud". Also, no matter what happens, do not set up "Mother-in-law 1.0" (It is a virus, it'll take over your entire OS system). Additional, do not try to re-set up "Boyfriend 5.0", we don't support this software and it doesn't fit with "Husband 1.0" which may cause unpredictable error.

In summary, "Husband 1.0" is an excellent software release, but because of limitations of memory capacity, it can not support new functions only for a short period. You may consider purchasing a software plug-in, to increase memory capacity and improve system efficiency. We suggest "Delicious food 3.0" or "Sexy underware 7.7".

Good luck

敬啟者，您好：

去年我把「男友5.0版」升級到「老公1.0版」之後，發現系統的整體效能變差了，尤其是「送花」及「珠寶」功能，這兩個功能本來在「男友5.0」一點問題都沒有。 除此之外，「老公1.0」也把原來好用的軟體殺掉了，例如「羅漫蒂克9.5」及「關 懷 6.5」，取而代之的是「世界杯足球賽5.0」、「NBA籃球賽3.0」和「PS2 4.1」。「談心8.0」也無法執行，還有，每當我要執行「打掃屋子2.6」，整個系統就當機，我試著用「嘮叨5.3」，但都沒辦法解決。

請問我該怎麼辦？

心急人

=================

主旨: Re:升級「老公1.0」

親愛的「心急人」

首先要提醒您的是，「男友50」是娛樂軟體套件，而「老公1.0」是作業系統。您可以在流覽器上方的網址列輸入：http:我以為你愛我.htm，試著下載「流淚6.2」，也別忘了下載「罪惡感3.0」的更新檔案。如果上述軟體可以執行的話，那麼「老公1.0」應該就會自動執行「珠寶2.0」和「送花3.5」了。
但要注意的是，過度使用上述功能，會造成「老公1.0」自動執行「發脾氣2.5」、「流連酒吧7.0」和「啤酒6.1」。「啤酒61」是個很不好用的軟體，它會自動上網去 下載一個叫做「鼾聲如雷」的測試版。還有，無論如何，千萬別安裝「婆婆1.0」（它是一種病毒，發作時會佔用妳的作業系統全部資源）。 另外，不要嘗試重新安裝「男友5.0」，我們並不支援這套軟體，同時它和「老公 1.0」不相容，會造成不可預期的錯誤訊息。

總結來說，「老公1.0」是個非常棒的軟體，但受到記憶體的限制，它無法在短時內學習新的功能。您或許可以考慮購買另外一套外掛程式，以增加記憶體和增進系統功能。我們建議「美食3.0」或「性感內衣7.7」

祝好運